Do you remember my friend?

Do you remember my friend the way we used to be?  The smiles we used to share and the jokes we once told?  Do you remember the innocence of life?  How naive we were to think of life as just a dream.  We dance till the music stops.  When we say goodbye, when we kiss, love, lose, and cry the music stops to wake us up.  The music stops so we pay attention, so we recognize life's moments when they happen.  Do you remember my friend.....the way that used to feel?


**I wrote this after finding pictures of me growing up with friends from middle school.  I moved away and things changed and I found myself looking at these pictures missing the way things used to be.  A few of the friends in the pic passed away a few years ago and it made me think about who we were when this pic was taken and all the things we didn't know about the future....This was my response to that feeling.**

Heartbeats and memories...

It's fleeting isn't it.....life.  When measured in blinks, breaths and heartbeats it seems like a lot but it's always never enough.  Love will always want more.  More laughs, hugs, smiles and moments.  That's why when someone passes our hearts ache for all the moments we had but mostly for all the moments we won't have.

Living in a Concrete Jungle.....

It’s when you’re in a big city being one among the crowd shuffling down the street between the buildings that block out light that you miss the simplicity of a small town in Texas.  I miss how the wild flowers would fade into bluebonnets that lined the two lane highways and how my mother and I would make a drive specifically for pictures among the bonnets.  If I would have known then that those moments would only be faded memories like worn paint on a house porch chipping away after the years, I would have paid more attention.  I would have memorized the sun and clouds on those days and the way my mother would stand and smile.  I would have taken deeper breaths and smelled the flowers as I kneeled down for a picture.  My childhood was filled with green and life and now in adult hood I find happiness when I see a patch of grass among the concrete jungle I now live in.  Nostalgia is what fills my heart now.  I keep finding my heart being pulled to what used to be and the people that used to fill my life.  But those days faded like water falling on a paper of words slowly pulling at the edges until there are new shapes formed and only a memory of what once was. 

America the Beautiful

Today my post is fueled by thoughts I had while reading that many people were not proud of the "America the Beautiful" commercial that aired during the Super Bowl.  If you missed it here is the commercial also followed by my thoughts on it and the feedback:

Apparently people are upset because other languages are singing America the Beautiful.  I personally can not understand why.  I am half mexican and half white, full American and personally I loved this commercial.  I come from a southern state but due to my husbands career we have gotten the chance to travel and live in many different locations.  I've come to a conclusion about where I want to live when I start my family.  I want to live where everyone does not look the same, I want to see different faces and hear different languages and smell and eat different foods.  I want to make friends and learn new things from them as well.  I want my children to see different families.

I have been the kid that looks around the room only to realize they are the only person who looks different.  I've felt eyes on me because they can't figure out "what I am".  I've heard snide comments and I've been the "little mexican girl" but I only know a very small fraction of what others have gone through.  I am still baffled that acceptance is not a natural thing for others to do.  I understand we can not all be friends because personalities don't always get along.  But to disregard someone because of their race or sexual preference is something I can not comprehend.

I want to teach my children (when I have them someday) that the world isn't always the same and the beauty is in what's different.